Broken Bella Donna

{September 4, 2011}   When…

When do you stop being a kid?

I just wanted to do something nice for you for Fathers Day, something I’m good at, something I thought would make you happy.

And it ended as it often does and now I feel sad, because you spoke down to me and ruined it. And you haven’t even told me what you thought.

I’m so tired of trying to prove myself to people, people who I know wont ever be happy, people who nothing is never enough. And I’m old enough to know this and understand it, but when it’s your own parents… I just can’t get past that.

It feels like a reflection on me.

If I’m so bad even my own parents don’t think I’m any good… what hope is there for me?

If your own parents think you’re crap, you really must be shit.


I think sometimes your parents may be outwardly mean or seem angry, but they love you inside and always want what is best for you. Life is tough, but what we give out is what we get back. They just want you to be the best yo can, and for some reason they may show it differently than you would.

Thanks for your comment Matt… but sadly I don’t come from a ‘normal’ family with a ‘normal’ background. Who knows what goes on in their minds? 😉 Either way I’m over it now, was just frustrated at the time. I’m far too old to be seeking approval and reassurance from my parents, but then again do we ever grow out of it?

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