Broken Bella Donna











{July 24, 2012}  

Blaugh. Stupid tv show encouraging people to freak out and worry about their cellulite, and then run out and get lasered within an inch of their lives to get rid of it. It’s sad. And dangerous. Don’t people – women especially – have enough pressure on them to be ‘beautiful’ without extra crap? I suppose I’m as bad as the next person – I’m taller than average and already wearing a smaller clothes size than average, but I still feel like I’m carrying extra weight. I still feel like I can afford to lose a few kgs, and that I would look better for it. I also acknowledge that this is due to my poor diet and lack of exercise, and it’s my own fault and if I want to budge anything there’s no reason why I shouldn’t be able to do it the right way.

I also saw some stupid diet program all over Facebook, and their page is full of before and after photos of women who were perfectly healthy to start with. I’m not sure which is sadder, that these women felt the urge to ‘improve’ something that was already perfect (if it’s healthy, it’s perfect!) or that they needed gratification and praise from strangers they’d never met, nor meet on the internet, whose opinion should be worth nothing and who don’t know their story to begin with.

Righto. So onto other more pressing things in my life, which hopefully aren’t quite so… sad? Depressing.

The obsessive part of my personality has come to the fore again. I’m once again putting myself into a position where I will invoke the evil Spazz Monster, by organising a social thing which will basically leave me in the potential position of feeling like I have no friends, no respect and no one cares to help me out. On the other hand, it may leave me in the potential position of enjoying a day, doing something fun and scoring some cheap and/or free products for My Big Project – I wont relax until it’s over though. I spend all this time leading up to it, chasing people and waving things in their faces to get help, I can’t worry but think it leaves me looking a little… desperate.

I’m also obsessing over my latest novelty fun – upcycling. Again with the upcycling. Keen to have a crack and upcycling busted lamps into beautiful new creations, instead of them getting dumped on landfill because they’re broken. Just need to come up with some brilliant ideas… assuming that I can get the bits I need. That comes down to whether or not the business who presently own them can chuck them in the rubbish, or have to send them back to the supplier. I still haven’t worked out how to make my beautiful colander into a light shade. But it is going to happen. Oh yes, it is.

Other than all this? Life chugs along in a very satisfactory fashion. Some aspects are not progressing quite as well as I’d have hoped, others are progressing very well indeedie. Swings and roundabouts.

The most important thing for me, is to keep progressing. Until I am where I want to be. Right now, I am moving forwards and this is worth celebrating.

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