Broken Bella Donna











{March 22, 2014}  

So much can change in five days.

Feeling good ATM. Life is playing nice. My experience is that this wont last, but meh, enjoy the roller coaster ride.

Taking positive forward steps with My Big Project and after a false start, am really pleased with the progress. Hopefully that step will be complete within the month, a big step that has been playing on my  mind for well over a year.

My boys general health and temper has improved. The scary health scare has been checked, concerns have been cast aside (for now) on the immediate problem, and the lesser (but long term) problem has settled. And his surprise change in personality that has been bugging me seems to be abating at present, which was the thing that bothered me the  most. Huzzah! My boy is creeping back to me, bit by bit. Why he went away may never be known.

I’m taking new steps towards my healthy future, and time will tell if they end up a permanent part of my routine or not. Fingers crossed. I am still on the bandwagon for the November 2013 change and a bit half arsed with the January 2014 change so… I have another potential healthy idea on board ATM – originally for the dog, but it’s something I can incorporate into my diet too that’s oh so healthy. So maybe?

Small naggy concerns around for my studies and the spazz inducing voluntary commitments which start shortly. But nothing dramatic, so far.

It’s the little things that are falling in my favour at the moment… overseas purchases being exactly what I wanted… my footy team winning… the big project… my boy. The weather! I’m having a good run at present and I hate hate HATE the fact that whenever this happens that cynic part of my brain whispers “Give it time”. The ebb and flow of life means that this WILL happen. Things will go your way, and then they won’t. C’est la vie. I need to learn to accept that and enjoy the good bits, and take the bad bits on board as lessons learnt. Every cloud has a silver lining, even if sometimes it’s hard to see.

I’m trying very, very hard at the moment to remind myself… will this matter tomorrow? Next week? Next month? Next year? I need to learn to stop playing things up and making drama where it isn’t. I need to stop looking for things to stress about. I need to be zen!

Happies?

 

  • My ‘jobs’ are all chugging along well
  • I am getting glimpses of my baby boy again which is more than I was getting this time two months ago
  • The weather is starting to cool off, which means slippers, jumpers, pyjamas and less fitted clothes that don’t hide my podgy belly
  • I’ve realised that I’m not tolerating lactose as well as I thought and that’s a certain cause of some of the podgy belly
  • My hair looks so awesome longer, and I am yet to get any pressing urge to chop it off as I usually do
  • The noises dogs make when they’re stretching or yawning
  • The smell of vanilla
  • Doing something yourself and doing it well
  • Cadbury creme eggs
  • Blankets
  • Breathing.

    Winning at life x

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